An actual "out of office" reply

Hey There -
I'm on vacation until September 8. Won't be checking voicemail or email, so
...If you need ...
• something urgent, please contact my office: 312-555-5555
• some BBQ, call Corky's in Memphis: http://www.corkysribsandbbq.com/
• some cheesecake, call Carnegie Deli in NYC: http://www.carnegiedeli.com/
• some shiny shoes: http://www.zappos.com/mens-allen-edmonds-shoes
• to rent a mechanical bull: http://mechanicalbullchicago.com/
• to rent a real bull: http://www.movielivestock.com/
• to rent a balloon: http://sky-view.com/balloon-rental.htm
• to rent a buffoon: http://www.clownsforhire.com/
• to put 25 smileys on a lawn: http://www.outdoorexpression.com/Smiley-Yard-Display.htm
• to see some awesome graffiti: http://www.flickr.com/groups/banksy/pool/
• to see some awesome packages: http://www.thedieline.com/
• to rock: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=c05E6kyHu8E
• to groove: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=y7m_y3wBzF0
• to funk: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7fdesO8CdC8
• to blow your mind: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=B-E6FDf9GkA

Cheers, Andy